Cookies and Confidence: How to Stop Emotional Eating

A Guided Check-In With the Parts of You That Turn to Food

If you’ve ever felt like there are a dozen voices in your head—some yelling about food, some trying to control everything, and some just wanting to hide—you’re not alone. Emotional eaters often have rich, complex inner worlds that can feel overwhelming and loud.
In today’s episode, we explore what it means to gently tune in to those inner parts of us with curiosity and care. Using a lens inspired by Internal Family Systems (IFS), I walk you through questions and reflections that can help you create space between you and the parts of you that feel anxious, compulsive, critical, or stuck. This isn’t about fixing or fighting them—it’s about listening and understanding.
Take your time with this check-in; you may want to use the pause button between questions. Or, you can see the questions in written form below. 
Think of this episode like a mental house-cleaning day: no big renovations, just clearing the clutter, opening some windows, and making room to breathe.
If you’ve ever thought, “Why do I feel so many things at once?”—this episode is for you.
If you are curious about more guided coaching like this, please connect with me at vickizollingercoaching.com.
 
Questions:
Can you get to know why this part is eating?
What might you hear from this part if you just listened?
Can we be with this part and see what it wants you to know?
Where do you feel this part in your body?
What does this part do for you?
When does this part usually show up?
How do you feel towards this part?
What is this part afraid would happen if it didn’t do this job?
What does this part like about this job?
What does this part not like about this job?
How hard does this part of you work?
What would this part like you to know about them?
How old does this part think you are?
Does this part remember how it got this job?
How old does this part think you are?
How much of what this part carries is inherent or was it born with it?
How do you feel towards this part now?
Would this part of you like some support?
What would feel helpful?
What does this part of you need you to know?
Does this part feels like I am understanding you or is there more I need to know?
If you knew you were safe and nothing bad could happen, what would you
rather be doing?
 

When You Wish You Could Eat Like a Normal Person

Have you ever thought, “Why can’t I just eat like a normal person?” Many emotional eaters have. In this episode, I’m talking about that question—where it comes from, what it really means, and how it affects the way we see ourselves and our eating habits.
You’ll hear about the hidden beliefs behind thoughts like “I have no control” or “I always mess this up,” and how those thoughts create shame and frustration. I’ll walk you through ways to get curious instead of critical, and how to shift the way you talk to yourself—especially in those tough moments when food feels like the only answer.
We’ll also talk about what “normal eating” even means and how to start creating a version of normal that actually works for you.
This episode is about letting go of perfection, softening the shame, and learning how to support yourself in a kinder, more honest way.
Join me for more like this at vickizollingercoaching.com.

When You Feel The Urge To Eat (But You're Not Hungry)

In this episode, we talk about a critical skill for emotional eaters: recognizing and responding to the urge to eat. Stress eating, emotionally eating, just wanting more than one treat, you name it. If you’ve ever found yourself halfway through a bag of chips or rerouting for a drive thru or needing chocolate right now, this episode is for you.
Learn what you need to begin changing the cycle—starting with how to feel your feelings instead of feeding them. Learn how to:
Identify emotional urges before they become unconscious eating
Sit with discomfort without suffering
Understand the "food noise" in your brain and what it really means
Practice simple powerful tools like breathwork, body awareness, and self-compassion
This episode is not about restriction or guilt—it’s about reclaiming your power, calming your nervous system, and creating a kinder, more conscious relationship with food and yourself.
It’s safe to feel. It’s safe to be with yourself. It’s safe to begin.
 
If this episodes resonates, please connect with me at vickizollingercoaching.com

When Food Stops Helping

In this episode of Cookies and Confidence, we explore the little and big ways we use food—and other small comforts—to buffer against our emotions. Whether it’s soda, snacks, or sweet treats after every meal, join us as we break down what emotional eating really is, why we do it, and how to better understand the thoughts and feelings behind it. Try out the concept of the “emotional math” to help you evaluate the short- and long-term impacts of your coping habits while also developing compassionate curiosity over guilt. Learn how small, honest shifts in awareness can lead to more empowered choices, and why mindful buffering might just be the next step in healing your relationship with food—and yourself.

When You Want To But You Don't

In this episode of Cookies and Confidence, we talk about the timeless question: Why do we struggle to follow through on our health goals—even when we truly want to? Test out three useful tools to understand the internal conflict between the part of us that wants the cookie and the part that doesn’t. Learning how to build a kinder relationship with your past, present, and future self can shift you out of the eat–give up–beat up cycle and into deeper self-awareness and growth.

When You Have Eaten the Whole Bag

In this episode of Cookies and Confidence, we explore the emotions and thoughts that come up after eating “the whole bag”—whether it’s chips, cookies, or candy. It's hard but slowing down, noticing what’s really going on inside, and connecting with all parts of you without judgment is worth it. This is not about food, but about the power of awareness, self-kindness, and understanding our deeper needs. If you’ve ever felt shame or regret after eating, this episode offers a gentle, empowering perspective.

When It's All Too Much

Listen in for an introduction on emotional eating and how it relates to sensory overwhelm and overstimulation. If you are using food to relax or cope with stress, learn how that may work for you short-term, but there's better options. I talk about how to know when you are in sensory overwhelm, understand nervous system resilience and tools for feeling better. 
Please share your stories on this topic with me at vickizollingercoaching.com. I'd love to connect. 

When Nothing Feels as Good as Food

Join me for episode 7 as we talk about solutions for emotional eating, especially when we overuse food to soothe, celebrate and relax. If you are feeling that nothing feels as good as food does after a long, stressful day, listen in to discover alternatives ways to think, feel and eat. Connect with me at vickizollingercoaching.com for more. 

When You Feel Fat

Join us for episode six where I talk about feeling fat, no matter my weight. Learn strategies for healing self-talk around mirrors, pictures and opinions of our own body. This is the stuff I wish I heard when I was a young girl and I need to hear again and again even as a adult. 
 
Connect with me at vickizollingercoaching.com.

When You Think Food Will Help

Join me for episode five to look at why we use food to cope and how it may serve us, but also how it may not. We talk about developing just five things for our weight maintenance goals and then sticking to that just 80% of the time. If you are done trying to control your weight with specialized diets and strict protocols, listen to this episode and discover your own answers for a life you love in any body size. 
Want to learn more? Connect with me at vickizollingercoaching.com.